She crashed a wedding, sobbed through the ceremony, caught the bouquet, proposed to the best man, called him the wrong name, and fell into the cake during her toast.
He delivered weed under the pizza to the same house four times in one night. It was a narcotics sting. He gave them extra marinara and a peace sign.
A drug-detection K-9 escaped his handler's backyard on his day off, wandered to a neighbor's 4/20 party, and sat in perfect alert position next to the stash. He ignored the hot dog they offered him.
He rented a house on Airbnb for Masters week, installed a keg system, hired a bouncer, charged cover, and made $3,400 before the neighbors called the cops.
He laminated Waffle House menus, wrote 'MASTERS' in gold Sharpie, added Bluey stickers for holographic flair, and sold seven of them at $400 a pop.
He broke in, filled a pillowcase with valuables, then fell asleep in the recliner. The homeowner made him coffee before calling 911.
She tracked her stolen car to a Taco Bell, sat across from the thief, ordered a Crunchwrap Supreme, ate half of it, and then told him.
They told family they'd been kidnapped by masked men. Police found them at Buffalo Wild Wings watching the Jayhawks game.