MOBILE, AL — A 47-year-old man was arrested late Monday night after allegedly stealing a riding lawnmower from a residential property, driving it approximately 2.7 miles through suburban Mobile, and using it to enter the drive-thru lane of a McDonald’s on Airport Boulevard, where he placed an order for 40 Chicken McNuggets and a large sweet tea before being denied service and apprehended by responding officers.

Earl Wayne Pittman allegedly took a John Deere riding mower from the front yard of a home on Cottage Hill Road at approximately 10:30 p.m. The owner of the mower had left it running, unattended, after refilling the gas tank. Pittman, who lived three blocks away and was reportedly walking home from a bar, has told investigators he “saw it idling and felt called to it.”

The Crew Did Their Best

The drive-thru cashier, an 18-year-old shift worker, told police she was uncertain whether to take the order. Per McDonald’s policy, the drive-thru is intended for motor vehicles. Per Pittman’s argument at the speaker box, a riding lawnmower “has a motor and it is a vehicle.” The cashier, after consulting with a manager, attempted to deny service. Pittman responded by inching the mower forward to the window anyway.

“He pulled up to the window. He had grass clippings in his beard. He handed me a twenty and said, ‘I’d like 40 McNuggets and a large sweet tea, please.’ I said, ‘Sir, we cannot serve you.’ He said, ‘I have cash.’ I said, ‘It’s not about the money, sir.’ He said, ‘Then what is it about?’ And honestly? In that moment? I didn’t know.” — McDonald’s cashier, name withheld

Police arrived to find Pittman still at the window, engine idling, having a philosophical conversation with the cashier about the nature of commerce. He surrendered without incident but reportedly asked officers if they could “at least get the nuggets to go.” They could not. The lawnmower was returned to its owner, who confirmed it still worked but noted the gas tank was significantly emptier than he had left it.

Pittman was booked into the Mobile County Metro Jail on charges of theft of property and operating an unregistered vehicle on a public roadway. His JailReport.lol booking has been filed under Mugshot Hall of Fame, where his beard’s grass clippings have been described in the comments as “a vibe.” Bond was set at $2,500. The original owner of the mower told reporters he is “not even that mad,” adding, “It’s kind of a funny story.”