BOOKING REPORT Booking #JR-2026-000249

Garrett Dean "Costco Card" Hufnagel

Age26
GenderMale
RaceWhite
Booking DateApril 20, 2026 at 11:10 PM
Booking NumberJR-2026-000249

Incident Details

Hufnagel was the second driver apprehended in what Denver PD is calling the ‘Taco Bell Nine’ incident, in which not a single driver in a nine-car drive-thru line could produce a valid license. When asked for identification, Hufnagel presented a Costco membership card ‘as a substitute.’ His blood alcohol level was .14. His Crunchwrap Supreme was held at the window for the duration of his processing.

DISCLAIMER: This booking report is entirely fictional and satirical. This is not a real arrest record. Any resemblance to actual persons is purely coincidental.