BOOKING REPORT Booking #JR-2026-000198

Todd Bryson "The Badge" Carmichael

Age53
GenderMale
RaceWhite
Booking DateApril 6, 2026 at 2:20 PM
Booking NumberJR-2026-000198

Incident Details

Carmichael was detained at the Augusta National gate after presenting a practice round badge that was printed on glossy cardstock at FedEx Office and still warm to the touch. The badge listed the event as ‘The Master’s’ — with an apostrophe — and featured a clip-art azalea that guards described as ‘insulting.’ When confronted, Carmichael identified himself as ‘Tad Worthington III, nephew of a member,’ a claim that collapsed when he could not name the member, the club’s address, or any hole on the course. He referred to Amen Corner as ‘the Jesus part.’

DISCLAIMER: This booking report is entirely fictional and satirical. This is not a real arrest record. Any resemblance to actual persons is purely coincidental.